Fevah Dream

I must have overslept today, because I had a really lucid dream wherein the Red Sox came from a 0-3 ALCS deficit to win 4 in a row and a ticket to the Big Show. What’s that? The Sox did win and I wasn’t dreaming?

Well, in that case, in no particular order, here is a list of people I hope Johnny Damon, Papi Ortiz, and, yes, D. Lowe have put into a depthless funk:

Hillary Clinton: fake-Spankees fan. Fuck the honorable cahpetbaggin’ dush (Ice Cube style, Sean knows what I mean).

Jon Stewart: No idea if he’s a fan, but he lives in NYC and is mad annoying. Fuck you, Jon Stewart.

Mario Cuomo: fucking communist moron Stankee’s fan. Even Ed Koch admits that you’re a putz.

A-Fraud: You overpaid little hooker, trying to slap the ball out of Cornrow’s hand like a 4 year old. You’re lucky that ‘Tek didn’t come out and shove you in your pretty little face again. Fuck you and your no-clutch-hittin’ ayse.

Jack Nicholson: Fair weather manslut, you’re such a huge LA fan, eh? Go back to Lara Flynn Boyle and cry about your beloved Skankees. Screw you.

Lorne Michaels: You know you’re a punk, Lorne. Maybe you can have Johnny Damon host SNL, like you did with Jeter. Damon’s hair has more personality than that little .150 ALCS-hitting byotch. Oh yeah, SNL sucks.

Everyone in the Stadium for Game 6: Good job showing your class, NYC. Now everyone knows what a friendly and inviting place your city is. Hell, they call riot cops onto the field in Beantown all the time. It’s like a tradition. Fuck you, Yankee Nation. It’s easy to love a winner. That’s why you boo your own team when they suck, you fairweathah bastids.

Bring on the NL!

~ by kinshay on 2004-10-21.